By late August, there’s a certain energy in the air. The sun is still shining (if we’re lucky), but the supermarket shelves are stacked with school shoes and lunchboxes, and you can almost smell September approaching.

For many children, the thought of seeing friends again and exploring new topics is exciting. For others, the return to school feels more like a slow walk towards a cliff edge.

In my clinic, I often meet parents whose child has become noticeably more clingy, irritable, or “mysteriously unwell” in the days leading up to term. One parent told me their son suddenly developed an urgent need to colour-code his Lego collection, anything to avoid thinking about school. Another laughed (a little wearily) as she described her daughter’s “school flu”, which, curiously, cleared up entirely by Saturday morning.

These behaviours are signs of a nervous system on high alert. A recent UK survey revealed that almost one in three parents had seen significant anxiety or even panic attacks in their child in the past year, and that’s across all ages, including the early years of primary school.

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Why September Feels So Big for Some Children

Change can be exciting, but it’s also demanding. Going from the slower rhythms of summer to the structured days of school means new teachers, different expectations, and shifting social dynamics. For children who had a difficult year, maybe a friendship fall-out, trouble keeping up with lessons, or a mismatch with a teacher, this return can feel daunting.

Some children are simply more sensitive to these changes. I think of them as “emotional barometers” they pick up every subtle shift in atmosphere, whether it’s a new seating plan, a change in lunch routine, or even the tone of the classroom. For them, September can feel like a storm on the horizon.

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Helping Children Step Back In

One of the most effective methods we use in child psychology is gradual exposure, supporting a child to face what worries them in small, manageable steps. If the idea of the first day feels overwhelming, start with little doses: a walk past the school, a quick hello to the teacher, or practising the school run while chatting about something light. This allows the brain to learn, “I can cope with this,” without triggering full-blown panic.

Another powerful tool is emotional coaching. As parents, you don’t need to “fix” your child’s feelings, you need to help them name and navigate them. That might mean saying, “It sounds like you’re nervous about seeing your classmates again,” rather than brushing it off with, “Don’t worry, you’ll be fine.” When a child feels understood, their anxiety often softens enough for problem-solving to begin.

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Don’t Forget Nature’s Role

I’m a big believer in the calming influence of the outdoors. No, you don’t have to relocate to the countryside (though I admit, a yurt in the Highlands does sound tempting). Even a five-minute stroll, some tree-spotting on the way to school, or sitting together in the garden can help a child’s body shift out of “fight or flight” mode. And, let’s face it, trying to spot a squirrel is a far more engaging mental challenge than rehearsing your worries about maths class.

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Making the Days Before Term Count

Use the last stretch of summer to gently reintroduce routine. Adjust bedtimes, practise the morning rush, and weave school-related activities into positive moments. Buy the new stationery and then go for an ice cream. Lay out the uniform and follow it with a family film night. It’s about linking school preparation with warmth and connection, not tension.

September will always bring some level of change, and with change comes a ripple of uncertainty. But with gentle preparation, empathy, and a few well-chosen strategies, you can help your child not just survive the first weeks of term, but find moments to thrive in them.

_{By: Dr Diana Goldsmith}